In The Name Of LOVE♥

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虽然命运爱开玩笑
真心会和真心遇到 

Dont know if it was another bad decision. Really cant stand myself at times. HAHAHA.

Had a hard time falling aslp last night and cld only slp for 2 hours. Unable to fall aslp after that.


Feeling abit.. okay. I think I'm okay.
I didnt even cry. Hahah.



Was just thinking, promising myself, I would be a good girlf in the future. Will not argue abt stupid stuff anymore, will treat him like king ! :D
(Provided he must treat me like princess too)
Although part of me very much wants to find a boyf quickly, but somehow, the time doesnt seem right..
I shall just have a little faith, I know God had made plans for me, and I trust and believe that it is the best for me [:

Please let tonight be a good night, dont do anything stupid, dont say anything stupid. The best would be to sit quietly at the table.


On a seperate note, I'm really quite pissed with myself.
When will I ever learn, I just need to learn to say NO, to reject. Stop trying to be nice.
Why cant I just say no..
Instead, I make myself miserable, going out with people I dont enjoy going out with, talking to people I dont enjoying talking to, giving numbers to people whose name I dont like seeing in my phone.
Haiyo.
Please learn from your previous mistakes.
My dear girls, please dont encourage me to go for such dates anymore...

Made so many bad decisions over the weekend.
Sigh.


Looking at all the guys ard me, really feels very zzz. Maybe its just me. But guys who think they are damn great shld really just go fuck spiders. Very zzz !


In relation to the above point, I really miss my ex boyf, so much that I can cry a never ending river thinking abt it. However, no worries, I'm okay, I have finally learned to accept the fact that he has either changed or I just didnt know him as well as I thought. And also to accept there's no way for us ever to get back to the way we were. Now I can only pray and hope that God will be kind enough to send someone as great as who he was to the very undeserving me. I know, I dont deserve someone great at all.


I really wish I cld relive the whole weekend..


Pardon me, I only had 2 hours of slp, dont know what I'm blabbering.




On a lighter note, I'm really excited abt DND this friday :D

People, dont cherish chances given until they lose it.

&

People, dont realise they actually have the strength to do it, until they really try their best to do it.

I never thought I would be able to get myself out of the cycle, but I did.
I thought I was weak but I was stronger than I thought myself to be.
The irony of this ? The strength came from the one who gave all the hurt.

Someday, a limit would be hit and you would just want to walk away sliently, you dont even want to cry or blame anyone anymore. You just want to get out of it.

With regards to the prev entry, I think having the best mummy in the world makes up for everything else [:

&

I'm so tired, your list of girls is never ending, I dont want to be caught in this cycle anymore. Let me go please.

If I ever marry a man like my father, I would commit suicide. But then again, I believe all men are the same, all male species in my life have been nth but disappointments. I think its in my destiny. I dont think I ever want to date / be in a relationship / get married anymore.
What a horrible start of the week ]:


I've so many things on my mind of late. I know mostly are things which I cannot do anything abt it, only time will tell. But I cant help thinking, worrying and just thinking and worrying.

& I cant believe how fast my exams are nearing.

Feeling kind of lethargic today, woke up half an hour earlier than usual for trng.
Really dont feel like working OT today.
I havent done any studying for the past 1 mth.
& there's this pain at my feet for days, probably caused by heels, dont know if I shld see a doc or wait for it to go away
& the backache that has been there since forever
& the never ending files

& above all these, holding back emotions to prevent myself from doing anything stupid.

Lord, give me strength.

I miss my old life, my schooling days, miss going to sentosa, miss my tan, and runnning, I havent ran for so long, if only there's one day I can reach home before 8.
I think I look older and more tired and not to mention, uglier day by day.
I'm really so sick of working now.
Despite the above facts, I'm really glad to see the faces in the past photos still ard me.
Love you all :D

& I'm really really determined to get my tan back ! (For now at least !)